So, another opening day story. I go with my friend to the Cubs game and afterwards sneak into a little corner bar called Bernie’s to warm up after the game. I meet a guy.
We start talking and we have some witty banter going. He was cute and tall and fun. Giddy up. He asks for my phone number and programs me into his cell phone (the new way to get digits at the time). He also gave me his card.
I never hear from the guy. I was kind of bummed as I thought we had a good connection.
At the time, I would have a party a couple of times a year to meet new people so I decided what the heck, may as well invite him (as I had his card too).
I put the e-mail out for my party and include him. I wasn’t sure if he was going to make it or not as I never heard anything.
Sure enough, he shows up at the party. I immediately go over to him and ask for his phone. He says sure, why? I said you have a phone number in there taking up space, I want to delete it. He smirks and says so sorry I didn’t call I have been busy. Yes, haven’t we all?
He went on to say he was home helping his Mom with a benefit in his Dad’s honor (who died) and was there for a couple of weeks. I decided that was a good excuse.
Anyway, we talk all night and end up going to a couple of other bars after the party. He says, we met before. I said yes (duh) opening day. He said, no New Year’s Eve, 1996, Las Vegas, craps table, Hard Rock Hotel. Surprised, I said, I was there? He said, I met you and all of your friends. We were the USC guys and you were the Northwestern fans.
This is all starting to sound familiar to me. He ended up talking to my one friend and hung out with her during the trip. Crazy!
He was living in Seattle when he went to Vegas then moved to Chicago permanently. Now, he is living one mile from me. And we figure it out 6 years later.
I ended up seeing him out at bars a couple of more times and we would hang out. Now, I told him if he wanted to continue to see me, he would have to ask me out! (I probably read the book The Rules at the time).
Here is the sob story. He was engaged and it ended so he needed time for himself, not interested in dating, yada, yada. I was a great girl but, he didn’t want any pressure.
So, we went our separate ways. However, he liked to do the same things as me so I would bump into him all the time in the city. Here is the kicker, I would always see him hitting on/dating other girls which went against what he told me, so it just never added up. After a while, a girl just doesn’t need to see it anymore.
Just when I thought maybe the torture was over, I see him out at a festival one night. I have really been trying to be friendly with him because he introduced me to his sister and she was great, so I wanted to keep the peace.
This night the dude decides to tell me he really can’t find any normal girls to date. I said, you had a nice girl (me) and didn’t want to date her.
He said well, here is the deal (yes, the real reason – finally!). He said Sue, I am 34 years old, you are 37 years old, by the time I am ready to settle down, it will be a couple of years away and by then, you will be too old to have children. Yes ladies, he said this out loud!!
He felt terrible that he said it but, too late, it was out there. There are lots of things I could change but, my age was not one of them.
Lesson learned? Sometimes it takes time to uncover the real reason someone isn’t that into you but eventually, it all comes out in the wash.
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