Many years ago, I was out after a Cubs game (shocking, I know) and happen to stand next to someone who was super tall. All of these people kept coming up to him and high fiving him, but I had no idea who he was. After a while, I turned to him and said, what is your name? The curiosity got the best of me.
Low and behold, he was a current NBA player and just happened to be attending a baseball game. He had a couple of Championship ring(s) so he was kind of a big deal. Kind of. I continued to stand next to him because I felt short for once in my life.
This was such a long time ago, however, I am sure our conversation was riveting post Cubs game. He asked me for my number but I wasn’t sure if he was married or not.
Come to find out, he was married so we embarked on the friend route. I met his wife and I would see them out and about from time to time.
For many years we stayed in touch and developed a fun friendship. After a couple of years, he got divorced and retired from the NBA. Once that happened, he started to contact me a bit more frequently.
I was never really sure of his intentions, but many times he put me in situations that I didn’t like. For instance, he always had a posse around him. He once invited me to a restaurant and I was the 5th girl at the table. He said, meet my hair stylist, my favorite bar tender, etc. etc. Oh hell no. I am not going to be part of his harem, not my style.
During this particular night, I excuse myself from the table and he follows me out. He said, why are you leaving? I said, I know you like to have all of these girls fawning all over you, but that is not going to happen with me. If you want to spend time one on one, let me know. I don't share.
I think the fact that I would challenge him was intriguing to him. However, I don’t know any other way to be. We all put our pants on the same way.
There would also be times when we were out and girls would be going up to him and flirting with him in front of me. I didn’t have any claims on him, but he wasn’t discouraging it. All of this made me a bit uncomfortable.
One night we were out with my friends and one of my best guy friends got in his face and said, if you hurt Sue, you are going to have to deal with me. From that point on, every time we were meeting out, he would ask if my “bodyguards” were joining. He did not like to be challenged.
One of my favorite adventures is when we put a friendly wager on a baseball game. The winner would get to pick which restaurant he/she wanted to go to, and the loser would pay. Well, I lost (darn Cubs). So, I told him I stand by my bets and to pick a restaurant that will make it hurt.
Shockingly, he picked a reasonable Italian restaurant close to my house. I knew the hostess (since it was so close to where I live) so I called ahead to ask if we could have a comfortable table since I would be with someone really tall. She told me she would take care of it.
We get to the restaurant and the manager comes over and says, I want to buy you a bottle of wine. I said great! (knowing I had to pick up the bill, LOL). I said, before we go any further, you have to let me know, is this wine because of him or me? (I was wondering if my friend who was the hostess set this up). The manager said, it is because of both of you. I pressed further but he wouldn’t budge. I had a bit of a smirk on my face with the ambiguity of the complimentary wine.
As we are enjoying our wine, there is a family who sits behind us who the former NBA playa’ recognized. My back was to them but he said, I am going to introduce you to this NFL Coach who you will love.
When this gentleman comes over I turn and look, and it is my neighbor. He said, Sue, what are you doing here? My former NBA playa’ couldn’t believe it, he said, I can’t believe you already know him. Worlds are colliding and I love it.
My neighbor sends over an appetizer. Perfect. Now we have wine and an appetizer for free. This bet is getting better and better.
During dinner, the former NBA playa' spills his heart out to me. He tells me that he envisions us dating. He said he has 5 people in his life who he trusts, and I am the only female.
I said, seems like you might need some better friends - HA!
I told him I appreciated the vote of confidence, but I wasn’t so sure we would be a good match. I said I am not saying no, but I am not saying yes. I said the nonsense you pull in front of my face, I can’t imagine what goes on behind my back. The last thing I need in my life is someone I can’t trust. My instinct was to take this slow to best understand if it was something I want.
One week later, ONE WEEK, I am sitting at home and my phone rings. It is one of my friends from the ‘burbs who called to catch up. She has four kids so our lives have gone in different directions but we always love to stay in touch.
She says to me, do you still keep in touch with that former NBA playa? I said yes, why? She said, funny story, my husband just met him and his girlfriend in a suite at the United Center last night.
His girlfriend. Why I aughtta…
Do you think I will let this go? No! I sent him a text and said, my friend’s husband just met you and your girlfriend in a suite last night at the game? His reply? Well, girlfriend is a strong word.
That’s it, I am out. I told him to basically lose my number. And, we haven’t talked since. Rumor has it he is married again. A sucker born every minute.
Lesson Learned? For every rat you see, there are 50 you don’t. Trust your instinct and don’t get caught up in whirlwind. Lastly, don't fall for words, watch someone's actions!
Amen Sue! I probably don't date as much as you for this simple reason. I simply can't and won't play the games. Unfortunately, guys are missing out ... when they can't be transparent, honest and for goodness sake have a recent, non selfie photo of themselves available. If I see one more selfie in the bathroom mirror photo, I will lose it. Those photos say one thing to me. I have no life or no friends -- and therefore, this is the only way I can give you a recent photo. Geez. #dontletusgoodgirlsgetaway