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Writer's pictureThe Sue in the City

Cold Calling


Years ago, a guy emails me from match.com and starts a fun dialogue. He actually commented on something in my profile verses the generic email so I was impressed.


I could quickly decipher that he was in sales as it was very evident in the way he spoke. (takes one to know one - ha). He lived in a far suburb so I really wasn’t that excited about starting something new with someone so far away. Spontaneity is always lost with a commute in the dating world.


Besides that, I had just started dating someone else, so I told him I wasn’t interested in meeting him at this time. I didn't feel like juggling a couple of guys.


He asked if he could follow up with me in a week or so to see how things were going? I said, sure. Well, you bet, almost to the second, he e-mails one week later to see if I was interested yet. I felt like I was in his trace file along with his work documents.


Anyway, I told him I was still dating someone. He then proceeds to e-mail a couple more times and we just have general dialogue. I probably should have been more forceful, but you never know.


During this process, he asks where I work. Thinking nothing of it, I tell him my office is located in a hotel. Now, I am a city girl and should have known better, but I had been doing internet dating for so long, I let my guard down.


A week later, I receive a call from our Concierge’s saying a guy is at the hotel looking for me. I can hear him explaining to her he is from match.com. So, he knows she connected with me as he was standing in front of her.


When I think back, this was a time when online dating wasn’t as mainstream as it is today. And, here this dude is sharing my business with my co-workers. Awkward!

And, it was crazy to think this guy just shows up during a work day? He doesn’t even call or anything? I found it creepy and almost stalker like.


I definitely did not appreciate the drop by but also did not want to put our Concierge’s in a tough spot by having her do my dirty work for me.


I walk to the lobby and he tells me he was in the area, I said really? Where were you? He said he was about 30 minutes away (which is hardly in the area as far as I am concerned).


Anyway, he wants to take me to lunch. I told him I was busy. He asked if I was still dating someone, I said yes. (I probably would have said yes either way though). He did not receive a warm reception from me.


This guy is cold calling dates. As a sales person, I appreciate how tought that is but, it is just not for me.


Lesson learned? If you have a feeling he could be stalker-like, cut all ties immediately. And being in sales, he should have picked up on rule number one, listen!


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