I decided to go on a trip for New Year’s Eve. I went with a very good friend of mine who is dating a guy she met on line.
As we were hanging out by the pool, she asked me how the Internet dating thing was going. I told her I was in a rut. She said, I know what type of guys you are looking for, why don’t I log on as you and start chumming the water? I said, great, have at it!
For some reason, she feels my guy is not a Chicago guy. So, she was looking at guys in Wisconsin, Iowa, Ohio, etc. I generally don’t go that far but I was open to anything at this point.
Within a very short amount of time, I start talking to a guy who lives in Iowa. He said he used to live in Chicago and was possibly interviewing for a job back in the city. Sounds great. He also used to work for the Bears and the Packers. Giddy up.
We make plans for him to come to Chicago for the weekend so we could meet. He asked me for a deal on a hotel room. I really thought that was kind of bold when we don’t know each other. Come to find out, he is in the hotel business too so he said his friends ask for favors all the time so why wouldn’t he ask me? I said, key word your friends, I don’t even know you, so I am certainly not going to lose my job over this.
He was a little put off but understood. He said he wanted to meet at 5pm at Gibson’s. Sounds great.
He is 15 minutes late (annoying) but we finally meet. Now, I am told by many that I have a big personality. Well, if mine is big, his is ENORMOUS. He comes in like a bull in a china shop.
He seemed nice enough but then he starts taking phone calls on out date. Strike two. I actually said to him, what are you doing on the phone?
Well, he was trying to sell tickets for the Bears game in the morning. I guess I understood, but still.
After two hours, he says to me that he was meeting some friends that evening for dinner and would I like to join them? He said he didn’t mention it earlier because he didn’t know how he felt about me but he really likes me so he didn’t want the night to end. I said sure, why not?
We end up going to this Italian Restaurant where I proceeded to meet his 8 friends, all couples. The girls were nice but it was a lot of pressure to talk to them. And, they knew he was on a first date, so, if I showed up, that meant things were going well.
So, the girls hung on my every word trying to find out how I felt about him. I kept saying that it was early, but things were going well. By the time we had dinner, the drinks were flowing so they all start chanting – kiss, kiss, kiss. What? He leaned over to kiss me and I gave him the cheek. The whole crowd yelled BOOOOOO while making the thumbs down sign. I told him I didn’t feel we needed an audience for that. A bit awkward.
After dinner, he said he needed to go to a hotel restaurant to give someone these tickets he just sold. I said, it is close to where I live so that is fine. He warned me that when he gets there, he will be doing a dance, so I need to hold his coat. Whatever that means?
As we arrive in this private area of the hotel, I learn that who he is picking the tickets up from is someone who works for the Packers. So, as he walks in, he does this dance that makes him look like he is having convulsions. The whole crowd starts chanting – Tiny, Tiny (I changed his nickname - and, he wasn't little). One guy was laughing so hard he was crying. I did find it entertaining myself.
So, we sit down and everyone asks me how I know Tiny. I said we just met. The guys all ask me what I thought of him. I said, he is fine. They say to him, she doesn’t like you dude. I said, I didn’t say that but it is just early, I have known him for 6 hours. They were asking about chemistry, etc. I found this inquisition a bit exhausting so I told Tiny I had to go home. However, a very impressive crowd with all of these big shots from the Packers.
He asks me if he could fly me to Iowa for a visit as a second date? I said sure. He gives me a hug and said thanks for the date. never heard from him again.
Fast forward 3 years.
I live in a building where there are a bunch of people in professional sports. My one neighbor invites me to his summer party and I ask him if I will know anyone there? I was indirectly asking if I can bring a plus one.
He says to me, there will be a bunch of people from the Packers there? Not sure if you will know any of them? I say, will there be anyone named Tiny? My neighbor stopped in his tracks and said, how in the world do you know Tiny?
After we both stopped laughing, I said I went out with Tiny a couple of years ago. He couldn't believe it. Such a small world.
My neighbor said Tiny's friends will be there. But, not Tiny. Whew.
So, I get to the party and my neighbors says he wants me to meet Tiny's best friend. I met him and tell him the story too. He seems like a nice enough guy but a bit of a player.
I think nothing of my conversation with him and have a great time at the party. Towards the end of the night, Tiny's friend came over to me and we have another conversation.
I learn this guy lives 3 blocks from me, is 50 and never been married, and is Catholic. I am starting to change my mind about his cheesiness.
He then tells me that his niece is in the lobby and is coming up to the party. I say great. He introduces me to her and she pulls me to the side and keeps telling me she doesn't like who her Uncle is dating and wants me to date him. He keeps telling me he feels a connection, all while having a girlfriend of 10 years. As you can imagine, it didn't go anywhere. Handle your business.
Lesson learned? Meeting a bunch of people on a first date puts undue pressure on the situation. It is either make or break. And, this town ain't big enough!
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