$750 Guy

Most years my friends and I take a road trip to South Bend and attend a Notre Dame football game. The game is typically full of talent (alumni) and we always look forward to the target rich environment.

We tailgate before the game and our tradition after the game is to go to a dive bar next to the stadium called the Backer. It is always a good time.

This particular day, my ankle hurt so I was looking to find a place to sit for a couple of minutes at the Backer. I see 3 chairs in the corner of the bar and a drunk college kid sitting in the middle chair. I told my friends I was just going to sit for 15 minutes and then would be ready to go. I walk over to the chairs and see a tall guy next to the drunk guy in the chair. I say to the tall guy, is this your friend? He said, no why? I said, I want to sit but not sure this kid won't throw up on me. Tall guy says, the kid will definitely throw up on you. So, the Tall guy tells the kid to get lost as a lady wants to sit.

Chivalry is not dead. Drunk guy stumbles away and now I have a chair! And, tall guy says, now that the kid is gone, I can sit too. I say, sure no problem.

So, tall guy and I make random conversation. He is from Atlanta and I asked what brought him to that area. He said he used to work for Delta Airlines and there is a major hub in Atlanta, so it worked best for him to live there. I say to him, sorry, I am a United girl....

He said, wow, I was just at United Headquarters last week in Chicago. I said, crazy, I was at United too? I asked him why and he said due to a meeting. Funny, me too. Sure enough, we were both at United Headquarters for the same darn industry meeting. We were even invited by the same person. However, he missed the meeting and just went to lunch. I went to the meeting and skipped lunch.

The universe decided to give us another chance to meet!

After about 45 minutes of talking, my friends come over and say, what in the world are you two discussing? He said, we have a question for you girls - when Sue and I get married, will you be in our wedding party? Laughter ensued. I said, well, we should probably have a date first. We exchange numbers.

We met in November and due to schedules, he couldn't come to Chicago until February. What weekend? Valentine's Day, of course. So, he says to me, will that be a problem? I said, not for me. How about you? He said nope, but it would just be weird if flowers showed up as I was there. Which made me think, where does he think he is staying?

I then sent him a text that said, do you need to know my address so you can pick a hotel close to where I live? Brilliant if I don't say so myself.

He said yes, that would be great. So, he pics a hotel one block from my house. Now, this hotel is not awesome, but, it is cheap. Wondering if this will come back to haunt me.

The weekend comes and I have to tell you, I felt like a guy and realized how difficult y'all have it. He wanted me to pick places to go since it was my town. Here I am trying to pick places I think he will enjoy when I don't know him very well.

Since I meet him at a sporting event, I decided to stick with the sports theme. It was FREEZING in Chicago that weekend (of course, February) so I tried to pick places closer to home.

We had a good time exploring the city but there were definitely some pregnant pauses. What we had in common was work but, as it turns out, I don't want to talk about work with people who aren't my work people.

At one point, we were at my local bar and the owner (who I know) comes over to chat. He asked my date where he is from and he said Atlanta. The owner says, why in the world would you come to Chicago in February? My date said, look at her, how could I not? Awwww.

However, after the weekend, I was feeling very indifferent about him. I just kept thinking we met in such a cool way, I need to see this through because it has to mean something.

So, he said he wants to come back and visit and I said sure. He lets me know he needs to come back in a couple of weeks for work. I said, perfect. He tells me he is going to extend by a day so we can spend time together. Great.

Closer to that date, I ask him where he is staying so I can pick a place nearby that hotel to go out. He tells me he is back at the cheap hotel he stayed at when we went out previously. HUH? I said, isn't your meeting at that great 4 star hotel? He said yes but, I am staying at the hotel by your house again. Interesting. Will need to dig further into that.

We meet out and I asked why he is staying at the cheap hotel, isn't work paying for this? He said yes but, the hotel by me costs less. I said, are you in a procurement type position where you are trying to lead by example? He said oh, hell no, I am just cheap!!!

I said, what do you mean cheap? He said, I was born cheap. I said, cheap how? He said, I cut coupons. I said, like $3.00 off a car wash? He said no, like .20 cents off of a can of green beans. I said, I am not sure what is worse. the fact that you are eating canned green beans or, you are cutting a coupon for 20 cents off of them? Geesh!

He said, I live in a crappy part of Atlanta (he went on to say he was robbed at gun point in his home) and drives a tore up car. He said, I don't like spending money, at all. Uh oh....

Now, this guy doesn't have any kids or siblings, what is he doing with his money? It is all very fascinating....

He then went on to say that he was annoyed with the hotel room he is staying in this trip. Last time he had a refrigerator in his room. This time he doesn't. I said, you are here a couple of days, what do you need a refrigerator for? He said he is not going to spend $2.75 for a soda in the soda machine. He is going to walk to 7-11 and buy a 2-liter bottle for that money. I said so, convenience never outweighs cost? He said, never! Uh oh.

I was really trying to make this work but these fundamental differences in money will not fly with me. However, we still have one more day to go out, so I needed to make the best of it.

For the final day, he wants to go see a movie. (A matinee, cheaper of course). And, I was totally fine with it since that means we didn't have to talk as much. I choose a theater a couple of blocks away that has a bar in it. I had a feeling we will both need a cocktail.

It was a painstaking process to decide what movie to see because he just really doesn't take charge of any situation so, we saw a romantic comedy. My choice of course.

Before the movie, we had a drink at the bar, and he says he has a story for me.

He said last week he was in New York for work and was in the lobby bar for a drink. He then said a “lady of the evening” approaches him. I immediately stop and think, what kind of story is he going to tell me???

He said the “lady of the evening” came to him and she said, I have services to offer. I can do X, Y and Z. He said, how much? She says, $750.00.

He then went on to say that his buddy came down to the lobby bar shortly thereafter. He said his buddy is very handsome and all the girl’s fawn over him at the office. My date tells the handsome guy that the girl over there is a “lady of the evening”. The handsome guy says, I will go over and see what is doing.

He says to the lady, I understand you have some services to offer, she says yup. She said I have X, Y and Z. He says how much? She sizes him up and says, $250.00. Wait, what?

For the record, these two prices were given very close together. It wasn't like she was yield managing the situation and charging less towards the end of the night.

Bottom line, the lady has to charge 3 times the amount for my guy? Oh, hell no. That is not my guy.

I did tell him that was a terrible story and he should never say it again especially to a girl. If he is $250 guy, great story to share. But, he is $750 guy! That should go to the grave with him.

He went back home to Atlanta and strangely enough, he sent me a text and asked if he could upgrade my status with United Airlines. I said oh, I am in the favor business, this is so appreciated but definitely not necessary. By the third time he texted still wanting to upgrade me, I sent him my United number. Sure enough, I am now a gold member! He is the gift that keeps on giving, especially when I am in 1st class.

Despite that, it was time to cut ties. I thought perhaps the universe really wanted us together, but it was not meant to be.

Lesson Learned? I am not saying I need a guy that would be charged $250.00. But, I definitely need like $350.00 or $400.00 for sure!? And, looking back, it is more fun to earn United status by actually flying and taking fun adventures than crazy dates!